How to Make Habits Stick
TLDR; Habits often don’t stick because we're focusing on the wrong things. To actually change your behaviour and have that habit last, create a system based on consistency over intensity. Do this by focusing on small steps, designing your environment, working with your brain, and ultimately make the choice to change.
We’ve all experienced feeling enthusiastic about a new habit only for it to fade after a few weeks. Whether you're an athlete aiming to improve training consistency, a coach trying to support your players, a parent striving for better work life balance or someone seeking healthier routines, the struggle is universal.
There are many scientists out there who have put out profound work on what actually leads to behaviour change (no I am not referring to social media self-help guru’s… I’m talking about neuroscientists and psychologists). I’ve summarized their work from the past few years, with my own experience of what works and what doesn’t.
It all comes down to consistency (not intensity). But why is it so hard to stick to something new? Well lets start with the brain.
Our Brain & Change
Brain Resists Change: Our brain's number one job is survival, not happiness. Yes, neuroplasticity is very much a thing, but our brain will always take the path of least resistance - the thought pattern / behaviour that has been repeated the most. New tasks take up a lot of energy, which is deemed harmful for survival, therefore not a priority. (tips below on how to overcome this)
Instant Gratification: Our brain prefers short term rewards over long term benefits. Delayed results are not appealing to our brain (but we can work with this!)
A System to Sustain Consistency
Less is More
Choose ONE thing you’d like to work on and select a habit that is so easy you can achieve it 80% of the time. Slowly increase the difficulty based on the progress you’ve made. Doing too much too soon is exhausting for your brain and unlikely to lead to lasting behaviour change.
Environment Matters
Your immediate surroundings are not just passive backgrounds to your activities; they actively influence your mental state.
Convenience: Remember, the brain takes the path of least resistance so shape your environment to make the new habit convenient and attractive.
Visual Cue’s: We can’t process all the information coming through our senses, so our brain filters what's important and what’s not. Use inspiring reminders of what you are working towards to remind your brain of what’s important. Change them weekly for maximum impact.
Barriers - Remove whats blocking your new action and add barriers to old behaviours or unhelpful choices, so they are harder to do
Work WITH your Brain
I’ve mentioned change isn’t the default (or preferred) mode for our brain. But we can overcome this.
The Basics. I mentioned change is energy consuming for our brain and our brain relies on sleep, hydration and eating well to function. It's the foundation for developing and sticking to new habits
Celebrate like a wild person, No matter how small. If you did two days in a row, pat yourself on the back. Completed week one? Happy dance! The dopamine release from the celebration helps your brain want to do it again.
Compassion > Shame. Try being compassionate with yourself if you slip up. Neuroscience shows that shame makes it harder to change by putting the brain in stress mode, blocking clear thinking, and causing avoidance, while compassion helps change by calming the brain, lowering stress, releasing feel-good chemicals, and creating a safe space to reflect and grow.
Stay Social. Doing things with others releases dopamine and oxytocin, making us feel safe and connected, leading us to want to engage in this behaviour again.
Novelty is exciting. Feeling flat in your routine? Switch it up.
Know Your WHY
When you feel like throwing in the towel, remember (and visualize) WHY you wanted to implement this habit in the first place. The more details and emotions you visualize, the more impactful it is on your mental state.
Leverage Your CHOICE Point
Although it doesn’t always feel like it, we always have a choice in how we respond to a situation. Your motivation will fluctuate and this is when your choice point comes in.
You will rarely feel like doing something that’s hard. You will only *feel* like it when you have done it so many times that it becomes automatic. THe more you follow the tips above (start small, shape your environment and fuel your brain), the easier this choice point becomes. And remember, it’s not this hard forever. The more you choose this new behaviour, the easier it gets.
All in all..
Changing habits isn't about willpower alone—it's about creating a system that supports this change.
Interested in learning more about behaviour change and motivation to support your mental health and performance?
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